let us share a story with our faithful readers, which at this point in time, consists of just l&c. there is a house about 10 minutes from where we live. it's a nice house from the outside but the inside is poorly decorated. which is a parallel description of the residents; nice on the outside.
c had her first encounter with this house when she first arrived in arizona. "gum"took her on a few dates. she thought that they had a great time and 2 months later he was married. not to c.
"gum" used to live in this house.
l's first encounter came much later. she was warned before she entered the threshold not to fall for "basketball PLAYER." oops. just last week, "bP" asked for her phone number to take her out on a much anticipated date. it was the talk of hackberry place (our house). days went by. no call. no text. no facebook message. l saw "bP" on friday night and all he said was, " why haven't you called me?" followed by, "you must have been waiting by your phone all week." it has been 6 days. "bP" has still not called. do you think she should stop waiting by the phone and checking every 5 minutes to see if he called? ...we'll give it another week. maybe "bP" will come around.
"bP" owns this house.
for some strange reason, c decided to return to the house of doom. she was blinded by the charm and looks of "animal style". they met. she was intrigued. two nights later, they watched horton hears a who on his laptop. c made some bad decisions and decided it was ok to kiss "animal style". make outs lead to relationships, right? wrong. he did ask her out.... and took her through the drive thru at in-n-out in her pretty dress. a dress that no one got to see, except this boy.. and his mom's car ("animal style" doesn't have one - red flag #354). the weekend after the horrific drive thru date, c ran into him at a party. he did not acknowledge her. ef you "animal style."
"animal style" lives in this house.
kisses&disses:
kisses:
-c getting some action. followed by the "trashiest thing that has happened to her in a long time." we all need a little white t in our lives once in awhile...keeps it interesting.
-l has gained a new appreciation for the background on her phone through staring at it for 6 days with no incoming texts.
disses:
-idiots who ask for phone numbers with no intention of using them. it's like the show hoarders. quit collecting things you'll never use.
-drive thru's on first dates. we do not feel we need to elaborate any further on this subject matter. even red robin would have been a step up.
-houses full of the boys our bishop warned us about.
Oh my dearest l&c, from your good friend p who has been observing the behavior of single lds men and women in singles ward for 8 years now, and 1 year before my mission. Just be careful, the "good" guys are very rare, but guys that can bring more misery and sorrow in your life (especially if you end up marrying them)than you could ever imagine are extremely common.
ReplyDeleteBe careful my lovelies, until you respect yourself and your standards, men will always take advantage. If you ever want my humble opinion, you are always welcome to call me. :)
Welcome to the blogosphere!
ReplyDeletePaula ~ aka Mise en scène aka Mrs. John Sloan aka Langford Haymon Genealogy aka Dana and Leslie's mom, though the last is not a blog!
Mr. Green..."until you respect yourself and your standards, men will always take advantage"...are you insane? That couldn't be further from the truth. Not sure where you live, but...that sucks. Great generalization, despite what you think there are plenty of respectful, peaceful, and gentrified men who do NOT take advantage.
ReplyDeleteWow! I love this blog. Consider me an official fan. I have not had a good, hearty laugh over a blog since...ever. That is of course, a blog I wasn't making fun of. This is nice, very refreshing, and in a "Sex and the City" type way also very liberating. Of course, I expect it to be at least PG13 rated.
ReplyDeleteThe big bang theory was proven false. Mick and the rest of the world: 1. Lauren: 0. :-)
ReplyDeleteI LOVE THIS POST!!!!!
ReplyDeleteyou guys are hilarious.